Valentines Day is an interesting day for me as a pastor. The “Love” holiday has so many ways to take it – some go for “romance,” some go for “fun,” some go for “gifts and demonstrations” and umpteen other ways of expressing love. I have never been one to get too excited about Valentines Day – I know all the romantics just raised a hand to object. Let me share a story from this past V- Day.
I was driving home after an amazing dinner party with excellent food and company. Kristin and I were driving home with another couple and Kristin was talking in the back seat. I wasn’t terribly focused on what she was saying until I heard her say something like this: “Love in a marriage is about finding the one who you know you can go through stuff with and be stronger on the other side. You know you going to make it. You work at it and you grow.” I didn’t say anything at the time but I thought about it a lot the next morning. I agree with her whole heartedly. At first hearing it, you ask, “What about romance? What about emotions? Feelings?” In our marriage, we still get all those. Yet, they are not our foundation. We got married when we were both twenty years old. If that was our basis for love, it would have taken some serious blows over the years. Yet, our foundation is commitment, communication and growth. We were at a marriage retreat early in GFC’s start and we came up with a mission statement for our marriage. “To live, love, laugh and know each other best.” With those qualities, our relationship moves forward with a confidence that we can weather whatever we experience with each other and the circumstances in our lives.
Hearing her say that made me think the next morning – “Our love has grown.” Then I found this really great quote by Chinese philospher, Lao Tzu:
“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.”
I love that thought…and the one it makes me think of…she is amazing!