(This is the fourth nugget from a teaching I did about the 7 things I have learned in my 20 years at Grace Family Church.)
Learn to Celebrate Each Other’s Wins
Pastor Frank Damazio came to GFC and was sharing with our leadership. He talked about an interesting dynamic that happens as a church grows larger. He said that “sibling rivalries” develop as you grow and it must be dealt with or it will begin to undermine your foundation and growth. “Why do they get those resources,” “Why am I not included anymore,” “I used to be the favorite one and I am not anymore.” You can imagine the endless questions of how we view church growth as it relates first to ourselves and then to others. And “yes,” it always starts with you first. You would be lying if you don’t look at how it impacts you first – it is part of our human nature to look out for ourselves first.
In my 20 years at GFC, I have enjoyed the wonderful opportunity to work on nearly every ministry. You name it; I have come in contact with it at one time or another. (Except Women’s ministry – Since Kristin oversees that, I get that one through her.) I have also had the great blessing of being a pioneer in many of those areas. It fits with my gifting to start things up and pass them off to someone who is more gifted to take it further down the field. So, you would think it is easy to watch other people hit home runs, right? Not really. I struggled with this one for a while. You want people to remember your efforts, relationships, and countless hours to impact a ministry. A good example is the Children’s Ministry. I was the first pastor over what is now the Zone, Clubhouse and Promiseland. We established the foundation, processes and values for ministry that are still used today. However, by bringing Pastor Mike Moore and Jeanna White into the leadership role, both ministries have blossomed into something far beyond what I could ever imagine. They are spectacular leaders and visionaries for children’s ministries. If I needed the “win,” I would never have given up the leadership role; thus, stopping growth and ministry reach in these areas. When it is time, you gotta let it go.
Pastor Damazio’s words crystalized into the question – Can you celebrate another person’s win? The answer is “yes.” Over recent years, I realized that I needed to get to a healthy place on this or my own foundation and growth were going to be affected. I had to do the work in my insecurities, need for approval and people pleasing. I realized that the “me” filter was undermining what God wanted to do in that leader’s life and in the lives they were leading.
In the end, I am one of the biggest cheerleaders for all of the ministries at Grace. I want to connect every person I come in contact with on a weekend to one of our ministries. I believe in our staff and volunteers and want them to succeed at their calling. It isn’t about what I would do in those ministries; it is about seeing people impacted by the other leader’s vision, gift and talents. They are called for this time to do it – why would I not want to celebrate that?
It is time for a “self check?” Are you in a sibling rivalry? Maybe your own foundation is affected by some qualities that prevent you from celebrating the wins of others. Make the effort, take the steps, do it today…in the end, you will be celebrating your own win.