My last post was about my flight at 5:2o am.  That was Tuesday.  It is 5:20am and it is Thursday…and I am in an airport again.

Yesterday, I had the worst experience ever flying.  After an amazing day and a half with a growing church that is really poised to take off, I was dropped off at the airport at a flight that was already delayed once around 3pm.  A series of delay, mechanical failures, reassignments, more delays we finally got on the plane 8:30.  With the time change, it was going to be close to make my connection.  Then, we went through another hour and twenty minutes of waiting for fuel, checking the manifest, filing a new flight plan.  It actually got hilarious to watch how we sat there.  My connecting flight  long gone, I made it to the hotel at 1 am so I could get back up at 4am to get back to the airport this am.

Here is the amazing thing.  I wrote last time about how God can work when we make ourselves available.  I wish I could say I was smiling and joyful about the unplanned stay over.  Yet, God continued to show me how He works when we make ourselves available.  I met a young man who attended an camp for kids without parents.  I met a 30 year navy veteran who was flying to Africa.  I met a golfer from Orlando.  I met a railroad representative who loves Pittsburgh.  All of them have their own stories, challenges and life that needs God.  Some conversations were deep, some polite and short.  As I sit here with my brain buzzing, I can say “God used me to touch their lives.”  No, not an emotional response, on their knees, radically accepting of Christ.  Instead, it was a kind word, a quick prayer, and a renewed sense of how we all need each other.  And they encouraged me too.  We all needed a little boost.

Ministry is people.  I know, I need to get back to Tampa, I have ministry to do.  Who knew that ministry can happen at midnight…in an abandoned airport…on frayed nerves…with little sleep…when I really didn’t want to be there.  Ministry is people – they’re worth it.

 

I just got off my 5:20 am flight. Since I am an early morning person, you would think I would be in my element.  Honestly, I was.  (It was difficult after staying up to cheer on my Bolts – tough loss but so proud of their grit and desire.)  What can you learn on a 5:20 flight…believe me, a lot.  Random observations before 7:18am:

• There are a lot of police officers tending to automobile accidents at 3:30am. (3 in 10 miles)
• You CAN find a parking spot in long-term parking at 3:50am.
• No, they don’t let you go over to the terminal before 4am.
• Yes, they will send you back if you accidentally go over because there was no one to check ID’s in the main hub.
• Yes, there are actually families with 6 kids who will actually get up at this time of day to fly somewhere.
• Yes, those same 6 kids will find the play area and play on every square inch of it until they have to board. (And question why they have to leave such a great playground?)
• This flight will definitely be overbooked and run out of overhead space.
• No terminal stores are open except for Starbucks and General goods place – quiet is so eerie and cool at the same time.
• Everyone (including the hip grandma) and I mean everyone is using headphones this morning.  Parents of the 6 kids – not.
• Yes, God can move on a 5:20am flight.  Most amazing conversation with a businessman about his journey in business and life.
• Yes, I continue to learn more about leadership, management and overall team building as a pastor.
• Yes, I see the power of a story…wow!
• Yes, we all can make an impact if we stay available.

Ok, its 7:18am…I am ready for a nap!

 

Find your voice and inspire others to find theirs.

Stephen Covey

I posted this quote recently and it just pumps me.  This has been one of my biggest “mantras” for the last few years.  Too many people don’t know have the confidence, security and courage to use their voice.  Or they don’t know how.  And what about encouraging others to use their voice…what would that look like.  Let’s dive in.

What is “your voice?”  Simply, it is your beliefs and the ability to communicate them. If you believe it, then you should be able to express it in a way for others to clearly understand it.  It can be as simple as “I believe it is going to rain.”  Simple, easy to understand,  and not much weight.  Yet, as you drill down deeper – relationships, faith, family, money and politics – you get a different sense of gravity.  This is where most people become quiet.

You need to use your voice.

You need to tell whatever is stopping you from expressing your beliefs to “Shut it’s yapper!”  This is one of the coolest gifts that God gives us – a sound mind to think, be logical, solve problems and find a way to share that with others.  Many times, it is that “other voice” that stops us. “You are going to look stupid,”  “No one wants to hear what you have to say,” “They are smarter than you,” and my favorite, “What if you are wrong?”

Let me address “what if you are wrong?”

You have a 50% chance of being wrong.  If you take the stance that I am constantly growing and learning, then you will use your voice with the intent of growing.  I share things but I also listen to the response and feedback.  I work through all that to evaluate what I believe.  If I need to change it, I acknowledge my lack of understanding and work on what I now believe.  The need to be perfect or the expert can stymie growth.  

You need to use your voice and be an encourager of others using theirs.  Imagine a relationship or an organization where there can be honest, true and clear communication without all the incumbrances of fear and insecurity.  Could there be pain – you bet?  Yet, the pain is exposed and it can be dealt with together.  A pain that is out in the open has so little power compared to the one that is hidden in the dark.

Use your voice today!  Better yet, encourage those around you to use their as well.  The results will astound you.

 

 

 

The only use of an obstacle is to be overcome. All that an obstacle does with brave men is, not to frighten them, but to challenge them.

My grandson, Jax, was at the beach with my wife, Kristin and some of our kids.  She came home and told be a really cool story.

Jax, at the wonderful age of 16 months is learning all the joys of the beach.  He doesn’t really want to get into the water. Yet, he learned if he walks down the beach, he can meet everybody…he gets “oohs,” “aahs, and sometimes he just helps them eat their food.   As “the mayor” (one of my nicknames for him) was on his walk, he saw two boys who would start at the water’s edge and run into the water, throwing them into the water with a splash.  Then, they would get up and run back out to the edge.  They would do this over and over again.

Jax was mesmerized by this.  He found himself wanting to run into the water.  He would run in and stop at the water’s edge. Then, he would go back and do it again but get all the way to his ankles.  Then, his shins. Then higher up the shins.  As he did this, the mom of the two boys looked at Kristin and said, “Sometimes, they need each other to be brave.”

Wow!  That is an amazing observation.   We get brave when we someone else is involved. Maybe you have an obstacle than is staring you in the face.  It is challenging you and you are stuck.  I encourage you to find someone who is “ahead of you” in the journey who has faced it.  Ask questions – how did they beat it? Find out what did or didn’t work for them. Become a student of those who are “pioneers” in that situation.  In other words, few challenges are unique.  Others have faced them and their journey can give you the wisdom and experience you are looking for to launch yours.

Finally, there is a great song by Amanda Cook, Bethel Music called “You Make Me Brave.” Beyond other’s experience, God will make you brave.  Just knowing that He is with you and that you do not go alone can give you the courage you need to take the next step.  The chorus of this song is:

You make me brave
You make me brave
You call me out beyond the shore into the waves
You make me brave
You make me brave
No fear can hinder now the promises you made
You make me brave
You make me brave
No fear can hinder now the love that made a way

Great words.  Great Challenge.  Be Brave!

 

 

 

Happy Birthday David Bonham!  My Dad…

My dad is a pretty amazing guy.  He turns 74 today and we still talk once or twice a week.  He is active – raising cows, chickens and bees. (He is nailing the beekeeping – teaches other how to do it as well.)   I honor him today for all that he has poured into my life…more than even he knows.  So, here are some random thoughts about my dad.

–  We both talk the same way.  We use our hands a lot and we are soft-spoken.

–  We both cry when we laugh.  I especially love it when we laugh together…we usually see the other one laughing and crying and it prompts us to do it more.

– We both think common sense is foundational to almost everything.

– We both like conversations we have during the day that are genuine and cause us to think.

– We both like to write.  Like the letter he wrote to me on my first day of college that was waiting in my mailbox when I got there.  (You thought I forgot – tell more people about those words than you can imagine.)

– We both like to have fun when we work.

– Now…we both have an age spot on our hand. (Inside story)

– We both fiercely love our families.

– Finally, I recognize the role my dad and mom played in me accepting Christ.  They went to church for a long time without a relationship with Christ.  When they made their profession of faith, they ultimately changed the trajectory for my sister and brothers.  Over time, we all accepted Christ.  I am the first minister in my family that I know of.  And now, Casey is following that similar path.

So, the last thing to say is that “we both make an impact.”

You really do!  Happy Birthday!

 

 

 

I was recently asked to speak to GFC’s Next Level Leaders – adults who feel that God has called them to be more than a volunteer at Grace.  These amazing people are leaders who truly impact the growth and ministry of the church.  They help our staff lead ministry at a very high level and demonstrate God’s love in a great way!

I was asked to speak on “How do You Lead Yourself Well?”  Great question and here are the nuts and bolts from my talk.

1.  Have a consistent devotion time with the Lord.  

This is a must for me.  Whereas my devotions have changed over the years, my commitment to it has not.  I am presently using the “choose between bible reading, worship, prayer or solitude” method.  I have to do one of those Mon. – Thurs. and Saturday. I am using the “Jesus Calling” devotion and it is amazing how God is drawing me into His presence during this time.

The consistency is the most important thing in my devotions.  It isn’t exciting and a thrill to see.  It just works.  Like in any relationship – regular, quality time brings life, growth and maturity.  I am happy with that.

 

2.  Have a “Personal Board.”  

     If a business can reap the benefits of having multiple advisors to navigate the challenges of business, why don’t we employ the same concept in our desire to navigate life.  I have been using this strategy for years and seen huge benefits.  I have “board members” for my spiritual, financial, business, life application, relationship and fitness aspects of my life.  When I am challenged (it happens a lot,) I go to my board for wisdom, insights and direction about what steps to take or to avoid.

The wisdom that has gone before me has saved me from a lot of pitfalls and bad judgements.  One of the best decisions I made was to submit myself to a personal board.

 

3.  Commit to Continual Learning.

    I will never stop being a student and growing.  My grandfather taught me the importance of questions and I have made that a lifelong commitment.  There is so much we can learn from situations, people and just observing everyday life.  I find more value in people when I realize that I can learn something from them.  I am amazed by God and situations when I realize how finite I am and how infinite He is.  I can walk in sincere humility when I can realize the greatness of someone else or how a situation has changed the trajectory of a life.

Commitment to learning doesn’t mean you aren’t smart.  Actually, it recognizes the genius of knowing that there is so much more than we can comprehend or imagine.  Tapping into that propels us forward!

 

4.  Commit to Find Ways to Lead.

 How does a pastor lead when he doesn’t get to preach from the pulpit?  When this happened to me, I was pretty discouraged at first.  Yet, I made this commitment that I would continue to lead.  I learned how to lead from the “back of the room.”  I began to realize influence had more power than words from the front.  I continue to grow in character and integrity because of this principle.  Influence can be positive or negative.  If I want to be a positive influence, then character, integrity and honesty are the foundation.

I also found outlets to leverage my leadership – two recent ones are social media and my blog.  I will usually post a scripture and a quote each day.  I am amazed how people enjoy reading those daily.  But it is gratifying to know that it impacts someone’s life.  This blog has become my version of “preaching.”  I love sharing stories and insights from life.  Life is hard and hopefully these “nuggets” are helpful in drawing close to God.

 

5.  Commit to Live in the Moment.

     Life changes by the hour, the day and in a moment.  One of my newest and most powerful tools is learning to live in the moment.  I used to prepared and strategize to the point of  “controlling” everything I possibly could.  Now, I realize that is futile.  If I truly want to let God control my direction and steps, than I must yield the reigns to Him.  I prepare what is needed, strategize for a period of time and lay out steps that I see fit. I do this with an open palm, allowing the Lord to do with it as He will.  Sounds easy – been one of the hardest things for me to do.  Yet, it has also been one of the most fruitful things I do in leading myself.

Living in the moment takes the burden off of me to “make things happen.”  I do my part and yield the results to an amazing God whose will and direction is better than I can imagine.

 

Today, this is how I am leading myself well.  What are you doing to ensure that you stay on the course the Lord has for you?

I have a great friend, he is actually “adopted family.  He is advanced in years and slowing down. He is eighty-one and he sometimes forgets things, gets frustrated and shows his age.  I call him “Bad Andy” after the puppet character Dominos Pizza used in commercials one time.  I was going through a tough day today and I thought about him.  The time when he gave me a unique gift.

Being advanced in years, even long ago, Andy loved hearing about my parents and grand parents.  He took quite a delight in the fact that I would call my grandfather once a week to see how he was doing and ask him “wisdom” questions.  He would ask if I had called him and did I learn anything. Ironically, Andy had his own ritual.   He  would make his way through the church offices once a week, sharing a kind word and hug for most of us when he dropped off his small group attendance.  On the day I found out that my Pop had passed away, Andy gave me a big hug and told me it was going to be alright.  The next week, he came in and sat down.  I asked him what he needed and he said, “Oh, not much.  I thought I would just sit down for a while.”  We would chat for a few minutes – never too long.  Then, he would say, “I got to get going…it was nice talking with you.”  I didn’t think much about it (I can become very focused when I am in office mode.)  He did the same thing the next week and I thought, “It is always nice to have a kind word from Andy and someone to see how my week is going.”  After a few more weeks, it hit me.  He was helping me fill the gap of my grandfather and our weekly conversations.  (I know you saw it, but again, I can get focused.)  When Bad Andy came in the next week, I asked him about it.  He got a sheepish grin and said, “Yes.  I know he meant a lot to you and I thought you’d like some time together.”

I run really hard in my schedule.  I bet you do too.  Can we all learn a lesson from Bad Andy and give a little time to someone else?  It wasn’t ever convenient at the time but it still means a lot.  Even years later, I smile at Andy’s gift.

 

One of the greatest lessons I have learned at GFC over twenty years is the power of someone’s name. I have Debbie Altman to thank for that. When I first came to the church, she had a black book she kept with her. When she met someone for the first time, she would write their name down in the book and try to remember it next time she saw them.

I can be kind of competitive so I tried to remember all the names of the people at GFC as well. This works out pretty good when the church is small but as we grew, it became quite a challenge. Here are some random thoughts about the power of someone’s name:

• It makes someone feel “known” when you use their name.
• You give someone value and worth when you use their name.
• Try saying their name and smiling at the same time – big win.
• If you can’t remember, be honest.  People give grace when you are honest about forgetting.
• Most names have a special meaning or family significance…great thing to ask about.
• Few people change their names – so it is something that lasts  a lifetime. (I did change my name to Todd in the second grade…such a great experience.  Changed it back after a year.)
• You don’t have to remember a lot about a person but if you remember their name…they will remember you.

One of the greatest tools you can use as a leader, a friend or a mentor is the ability to remember and use someone’s name.

 

“Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.”
Hebrews 11:1 NKJV

God is doing something.

Have you ever gone through a time where it just makes you scratch your head to what God is doing?  I understand because there are things happening (and not happening) that just make me think, “What is God doing?”

I wonder what God does think when He watches us try to solve and figure out all that encompasses our lives.  Does He chuckle at us, with all of our limitations, while we pray our solutions?  Does He wonder if we forget that He continues to lay out a path that is for our good?  Does He recognize that every challenge and struggle that we turn to Him is a great stride of victory in our relationship?

God is doing something.

The real question that we need to ask is “Can I live with that something?”  Do I have enough in my relationship with God to say,”I trust in you and believe that you have my best in mind when this happens.”  It is easy to say the scripture above – but do I believe it?

Two words jump out to me – “Substance” and “evidence.”

Substance is defined by Merriam-Webster as “ essential nature, a fundamental or characteristic part or quality.”  The very essence of hope is a faith that believes.   If you go to the foundational core of believing in something, you will find a seed of faith.  That is where I find God is challenging me.  In each of these questions, do I have at least a seed of faith to believe that He is leading, directing and ultimately, responsible, to bring the results to pass? Easy to say “yes,” hard to live out sometimes.

Evidence is more to my liking.   Again, it is defined as “the available body of facts or information indicating whether a belief or proposition is true or valid.”  This is where I live.  Give me the facts, the proof, the indication that what I am hoping for is coming to pass.  Yet, the verse above says that the same seed of faith is the present proof when you can’t see the results.  In other words, the fact that you have faith in God for something reiterates your belief that He is working on your behalf.  (Way to go – you are farther along than you thought!)

If you are believing in faith for something, keep going!  Your faith is moving you closer to God.  And that is always in the right direction.

 

It sounded so simple…

I was talking with a friend who played collegiate golf. He is impressive in his shots and patience with those of us who are learning the game. He was telling about a friend of his who is on the professional tour, when he smiled and asked, “Have you ever seen a professional on practice day?” My turn to smile – I have never been to a professional tournament. What does a pro do during the practice rounds.

“While most people visualize a hole from the tee box to the green, a pro will work from the green to the tee box. They work their way backwards.” In other words, they start on the green and take a lot of time learning all the nuances of the green based on where the holes will be during the tournament. Then, they go to the fairway to look at the fairway and landing areas for their approach shots. Finally, they make their way back to the tee box to know what club they need to reach the middle shots.

Great advice for all of us. When we work our way backwards, we start by identifying what the final goal is. Like the terrain of the green, we should be able to visualize the different characteristics of great results in the end. Then, we should be able to state the milestones that will help us approach the end results with the greatest assurance of success. Realizing there are more than “one way to the cup,” we will look at different landing areas or contingencies that could come up along the way. Finally, we look at our starting point and identify what initial steps will set us on the path for a good run at our goal.

Try it! Pick a goal or something you are working on and “work your way backward.” You may be surprised how easy it is to begin when you see it from the end.